Winner!!!

Ok this post is perhaps a little mean, but humorous.  This was a resume that I had recieved for a job posting.  This is a prime example of...a resume that could use some improvement.  Let me paint the picture of how this was delivered first of all because the whole experience was a sight to see.  I was doing my thing at work up at the front and I could see a gentleman strolling up confidently with a stack of papers in hand.  Right off the bat I could tell that he either had a resume or some sort of flyer for a high school play or something.  He must of been in his late twenties or early thirties.  Baggy jeans, worn out tennis shoes, white loose t-shirt, and some sort of vest/sweater?  It was a button up vest but made of some sort of cloth.  Oh, and a newsie hat and big headphones.  He came right up to me and asked if we were hiring.  I said that we were and he elegantly handed the resume to me.  I said thanks, he then nodded, which was a sort of bow, and then he strolled back out of the store.  To top this all off he slipped his headphones back over his ears and played air drums on his way out of the store.  This drum solo continued all the way to his car.

Here is the resume, read this and we'll talk about this:

So here we are.  Lets discuss this little gem for just a second.  Aside from the fantastic grammar.  This is quite the read.  I like how hiring this chap is a compromise, "Let's help each other out."
With his first employment reference he designed and manufactured solenoidds.  He did that for them.  He was fired.  They did that for him.
Draw in charcoal?
Compose electronic music?
DOESN'T SMOKE!?!
Well, maybe if he took up smoking the composing and drawing in charcoal would be more successful.  I can't imagine that most electronic musician composers find creativity being sober. 
He even worked at K-Mart.  Wow.  Hired.  He even worked at K-Mart.  High school grad plus a few college classes probably mostly consisting of technical theatre, I'm guessing in his early twenties???  So, yeah, pretty motivated.  Obviously.

You know what.  We should get together and talk about our futures.  It's too bad he doesn't smoke, that's when most people get together and talk about their futures air drumming, drawing in charcoal, and composing electronic music.

I hope you enjoyed this.  Thank you for taking the time to read this blog.  We should get together and talk about our future.  Let's help each other out.

Larry vs. Lawrence - Round 1

I don't mean for this post to be a vent, but I have got to clear something up that drives me nuts!  My name is Lawrence.  I like my name and I think that it's a good strong name.  I always introduce myself as Lawrence.  Now here is what I have problems understanding...why does everyone think that after I introduce myself as Lawrence I would want to be called Larry?

Did I say that my name was Larry?  If I really wanted to be called Larry I'm pretty sure that I would have introduced myself as Larry.  I want to show a comparison of a Larry vs. a Lawrence.  Here you go:

 

BAM!  Look at this gentleman...His name is Larry.  He is a stooge.  Why the hell would I want to be called Larry and have this in my mind when people are talking to me?  How could I be taken seriously?

 

Ok now take a look at this guy.  Lawrence of Arabia.  Good looking chap has a gun, a knife, a sweet motorcycle.  Survived in the Arabian desert and helped a people fight for freedom.  (Just as a side note, I don't recommend watching the movie unless you have  A LOT  of time on your hands and can actually sit through a movie that will take most of your day.)

So enough ranting and venting.  Since I'm starting this blog I just want to make it clear that my name is Lawrence and not Larry. 

Ready, Set, Go!

We always mean to do things in life but, for the most part, are too lazy to actually do them.  This one is for me.  Just so you know my blog will have all sorts of stories from my life.  Past, present, and not so much the future I'm no psychic but if you are then by all means  whip out the tarot cards and tell me when I'll die.  I am a work-a-holic, student of learning, musician, motorcycle enthuthiast, and self-proclaimed jack of all trades but master of none.  I love to do new things.  I love to eat new foods and try new places to eat.  I work out everyday.  I read as much as I can.  I wish I could do a lot of other stuff.  I figured that now is a good time as any to actually "blog" my life story as it unfolds.  I work in a job that I have a lot of free time with a computer so might as well do something productive if I'm going to get paid to do nothing.

I'm sure that you'll enjoy this blog and string of "words of wortham" some of the stories that I'll share are pretty entertaining.  Life works out that way.